i'm confused here...

a student in wisconsin brought a gun to school and shot to principal several times before being caught by police. this happened two days after the school shooting in colorado, again.

what bothers me is that this kid that shot the principal didn't have a lot of friends and used to make comments about bringing things to the school and hurting others students. and yet they said that this event couldn't be predicted?

if i were in my old high school and made a comment about hurting others there, i'd be busted in about 30 minutes.

why?

because saying stuff like that is serious, and it should be taken seriously. when someone repeatedly says that they're gonna hurt other students, they're not joking, no matter how much it might seem like it at the time. they're seriously thinking about it, and want to watch the reactions of others when they say it.

it just confuses me that it could be seen as normal for a kid to constantly make references to hurting others at his school. but that's just the opinion of a small town california girl.

bleh....

i'm going through that phase again.

that one where the little voice of doubt speaks a wee bit more clearly and enunciates correctly just enough to that i can hear it and start paying attention to it.

i'm doubting my relationship and the people in my earth science group. while i'm sure the latter is perfectly alright for me to question, as no one but me has really worked on the project thus far, i hate doubting my relationship.

i've got the feeling that i'm just letting my disillusionment with school and the people that attend columbia college get to my personal life, and that sucks.

i think i need to get out and actually do something, as camping was shot down for last weekend.

another bummer: i wanted to go to san fran for my birthday this year, but it looks like i have to spend quality family time with the folks. i just wish we could spend it the weekend before, so that i could have some fun with my friends on halloween (what little fun a 19 year old can have on that day...)

on a slightly grosser, paranoid note, i've become obsessed with my breath. i'm constantly worried that it smells bad. though on the plus note, i am brushing my teeth more than the recommended two times a day, and i can eat three cinnamon altoids at a time.

folsom street faire

yet another brief, yet amusing, run down of sunday september 24th

* me and dad leave around 8 for pleasanton so we can take bart to market street.

*on bart, i make a comment about the women's leather booth, disturbing the lady sitting across from me and dad.

* at market street, we start walking towards 8th street, following the sea of leather down market, turning onto 8th, and then to the barricades.

*we paid $5 each to get in, and when dad said "that you sir", he was promptly corrected, "that's ma'am." because all chicks have a 5 o'clock shadow.

*we start walking inside, and we pass a row of port-a-potties. right as we start going, a guy clad in only a leopard print tarzan cloth walks out and talks with his partner, dressed as a policeman.

*within 2 minutes, i see an uncircumcised guy with a prince albert, how interesting....

*after about 7 minutes, i've taken roughly 5 shots of the various...people in their leather getups.

*a rather attractive couple poses for me while i take a few frames of him pretending to whip her, all while she's wearing a collar and a chain and some pieces of leather. as straight as i am, she had a nice butt.

*i see a guy sitting in a chair in armor, because armor is so sexy..., and he kinda creeps me out by not moving, just breathing really heavy...

*i see a girl with fur leggings on and hooves on the bottom, and let's not forget that leash she's on...

*a leather wolf comes on the scene, or at least a girl dressed as a leather wolf. i'm instantly reminded of that creepy pig mask from the saw and take her pic.

*furries show up, and i feel sympathy for them because there's no breeze at all that day and it's at least in the 80s.

*i decided to take pics of the 6 foot drag queens instead of the furries, or the guy with at least 10 piercings in his wang. which makes me think, how does he have sex? does he take them out, or does he just go for it and hope that nothing catches and then cleans them really good after?

*i see some random guys dancing with colored flags, my instincts tell me that these make up the gay pride flag colors, but i don't really know.. above them is a guy in a cage being lifted up and down by a crane.

*some guy that's really bad at dancing looks at dad in a way that i find a touch creepy...

*i work my way to the front of a booth that has people all around it to find myself face to...butt with a girl dressed as a catholic school girl getting caned. she's being interviewed and apparently this is a first for her, and her name is eve. how sweet.

*i see corn on the cob, meats on sticks, and hot dogs, but i see no chocolate covered bananas.....

*they're selling paddles that say stuff like slave and bottom. and they're placed so that when one is struck hard enough with a paddle, the butt turns red, except for the lettering.

*a man with a gourd on is standing under a sign that says "get your gourd on" and is saying that it costs $1 to take his pic. even though i think he has enough to give me change from a $10, i really don't want to take money form his crotchal area...so he lets me take his pic for free anyways..

*a few guys start masturbating in public, and people are taking pics, which makes me wonder whose worse: the guy for public masturbating, or the people for taking pics of it and edging him on to keep doing it...

*creepy asian guys won't get out of my way as they film the faire with their camera phones.

*i take a sticker that says "got wood?" i joke about putting it on the pellet stove, but later i end up threatening to put it on adam's butt.

*i see a family with kids about man crotch high walking around, and i wonder how traumatic this is going to be for the kids when they get older and have a fear of penises.

*there are camera's everywhere, and i highly suspect that they aren't being used to take photos for a photography class....

*my mom wants copies of the pics, my aunt wants copies, my dentist and his assistant want copies, and some guy at my dad's work wants copies....

*my mom, my dentist, and his assistant all want to go next year with me.

hawaiian car

i have the sudden nostalgia for my mom's old car. okay, it's not that sudden, i've been thinking about it for a few days. ever since i got teh bruddah waltah song, hawaiian car, i can't stop thinking about the toyota that my mom used to have in hawaii when i was little.

i remember picking off teh rust that was all over the body, and piling on towels so her seats wouldn't ge too wet. and then that gallon jug filled with water that she would use when the water got too low. it had a great, fnny little smell to it, probably a perma-wet from the beach water. none the less, as much as i made fun of that car, it was my mom's hawiian car, and i miss it.......

folsom street fair

september 24th is the folsom steet fair in san francisco. i'm rather excited because if i can go, my human sexuality teacher will give me extra credit, and i can take pics and use them as a photography assignment. hooray freedom from censorship!!!

for those that don't know, the folsom street fair is a parade type thing that goes almost all the length of folsom street in san francisco, about three or four blocks from market street. it's a leather fetish parade, sure to be filled with as many gays as straights, though maybe more gays. but that doesn't matter. i have a chance to kill two birds with one leather covered stone, or should it be i have the chance to kill two birds with one whip?

anyways...

i'm also interested in how others are taking this news. it's a small social experiment to me. i know some are gonna be asking me if i'm gay, and i'm sure i'll get a lecture about how evil gays are. along with how people will take this news, i'm curious to see how i react when i get there. the homepage for the parade was nice enough to not include any full on nude pics, though i did catch a glimpse of some man and woman butt, that was as bad as it got. so i'm curious to see how i'll react to whatever is paraded about on the streets.

rest assured, i'm not going alone. since this is a school assignment, my dad's agreed to go with me, as long as we don't stay too long. and to be honest, all i need to five good pics i can develop and print, so i'm looking at about three hours tops watching the parade, and that makes dad happy.

so this should be interesting, and if i do get a chance to go, which i think i will, it'll be a truly new and exciting experience that will help me learn about the big world i'm going to go into next year.

tool

a not so brief, but amusing run down of the tool concert:

* i'm picked up at my house at noon, and by 12:30 i had heard the phrase "we're going to a tool concert" roughly 20 times.

*megan does countless u-turns because she's actually listening to adam when he keeps naming off different places to grab some lunch. i finally tell him to shut up we go to wendy's.

*we get there at three, parking doesn't open until 5:30.

*we eat at a&w and then debate heading to the corporate bastard of america just to get out of the heat. we decide "f*** wal-mart, let's go get a motel room."

*after deciding to grab a motel room for the night, we try the royal motel with no luck. adam steals a melon...

*we find the red court inn and are about to leave when we're told it's $70 for two beds. when the guy hears us talking about super motel 8, he lowers the price to $55.

*we chillax in the room until about 5:30, when we head down to the amphitheatre.

*parking is open, but the gates don't open until 6:30, so we sit for Otto 45 minutes, wishing the guys in front of us weren't so weird.

*gates open at 6:30, and seating doesn't open until 7:30, so we spend an hour walking around. adam buys a beer, that loser, for $7.50. i but a water for $2.50.

*i call alex because my buddy's supposed to get my schedule for me and tell me when i work on monday. when i finally get a hold of him, he tells me that he forgot to look it up. when i finally get off the phone with him, i'm separated from the group. and of course everyone's wearing black, so looking for megan is impossible. luckily adam's 6'5" and is wearing a neon green shirt, so i find them in about 30 seconds.

*megan sees her ex-boyfriend and i see a guy i have photography class with.

*the gates open and we make it to the lawn part of the amphitheatre where our seats are.

*isis opens for tool, and they kick ass.

*tool comes on and the people next to me start smoking weed.

*we stand for about three hours while my eardrums and inner ear bones commit suicide because i happen to be sitting about six feet behind and ten feet below the speakers.

*after the concert, we go to the car and wait only about 5 minutes before we can get out alright.

*we get lost on the way back to the motel, but not for long. We forgo food for the night and crash on the beds.

*when we're watching tv, adam decides to jump onto the bed, but he doesn't see my head on the pillow, and he hits my nose.

*i bitch him out for a few minutes

*the girls take one bed, guys in the other and i sleep from about 12-5am.

*me and adam, being the only ones up, go to jack in the box (conviently located across the street) and grab some grub.

*we come back and wake everyone up, pissing off a few people.

*we head out by around 8:30, and i realize adam's left my aunt's blankets at the motel by 9:30, but megan doesn't want to turn around.

*by the time i get home, it's about 11:30. i stay up and recount my tales before going to sleep for 5 hours.