*slump*

today is the first day of actually going to class instead of sitting in front of the internet wondering what the hell aplia is and why i can't just use web ct....

so far i've only gone to one class, as this is my 1 hour break between astronomy and physchology. i walk into the class i see people that i tried oh so hard to avoid, and have until today been able to have no classes with them in it. these are mostly people i went to high school with that slacked off and acted like preppie, annoying, bitches that don't care about learning and that are sure to make my life annoying for three hours a week.

three early morning hours....*slump* oh well. i'm also concerned about the fact that on tuesdays i have a three hour block of nothingness..

what am i going to do here for three hours? even if i drove, i wouldn't want to leave because i would have gotten a sweet parking spot, and the general rule is that you do not abandon such a sweet spot if you have to come back anyways. and besides, gas is too expensive and i'm a cheap/poor college student that refuses to pay it....

so i've got the distinct feeling that i'll be posting more blogs and bulletins here and on myspace to kill time so my brain can get over the assault of the bubblegum chewing laughs emitting from the preps that assure each other that they'll get an "a for effort" in this class.

but the day is still young, hopefully i can see someone that will brighten my day by giving me a chance to have an intelligent conversation.

life sucks, but not entirely....

yes!! school starts today. and while a lot of people hate school, i'm glad to be putting my brain to use after months of atrophy. it can be hard to have deep thought provoking discussions in the staples break room....

dammit!!! i had to pay $60 on top of my class fees and buying a new econ book for aplia, a program that mjc apparently goes through for their econ classes. i found this tidbit out today as i was signing in for my online class for the first time.

sweet!!!! the tool concert is this weekend and so far it's looking like i'll be able to go and hang out with my friends for some much needed "getting away from it all" time/

crap!! i think i have poison oak on my leg.....which really sucks as i've never had it before and i have pretty much until saturday morning to get rid of it.

finally!! i've found some hawaiian radio stations online that play live streams of music.

but i still can't find the lyrics to the song about mount haleakala and therefore can't find the real title, making it impossible for me to limewire....crap....

that's about it i guess, some good things, some bad, but it's all evening out i guess....i just hate poison oak right now....

if the us took a page out of china's book.....

i was reading the odd news today, and a chinese woman was caught with heroin soaked panties and long johns. just the fact that a person would transport drugged soaked panties seems sorta ingenious to me.

hear me out on this one. "no officer ,that's not drugs that's making my panties soaking wet, that's my pee after i watched rocketman for the first time." what officer, in the us at least, would sniff the panties, and then maybe dab his finger in the goo to taste it and determine if it's pee or heroin and water? but apparently in china, they drug test your panties and then, to determine just how much drugs you have, they weigh them.

this is a simple enough process, just weigh the drugged panties, and then....get the eight of dry panties somehow and subtract the dry weight versus the wet weight. in the us, we'd probably send the panties to some kind of drug/panty centrifuge and separate the drug from the underwear. Then there would be tests to see how pure it was, only to find out that the drugs "mysteriously disappeared", thus throwing the case out of the courts due to a lack of evidence. and the fate of the panties? they were repackaged and sold at one of the many wal-marts in china.

but what really interests me is that if found guilty, this lady faces the death penalty.

at first i thought, that's way too hard core, but then i reconsidered.

if you knew that they would kill you if you dealed drug, would you be so willing to do so? my thoughts then went to the us. look at the failing war on drugs. weed is ever rampant, and it's pretty obvious that movies like "refer madness" don't stop the drug use. in fact, i was curious if weed would help my piano skills, but i decided that piano's for people that care about their musical studes a wee bit more than i do.

getting back on track, it's my opinion that drug sales would plummet if drug dealers were executed instead of being put in prisons were they can learn about other drugs to deal and ways to deal them. with execution, the drug dealers would know that the us was serious, that it kill everyone before the youth of america picked up the piano.

but let's not stop there. know how everyone says that child molesters should have their wangs cut off? what's stopping you? if the us took a page from china's book and stared cracking down with harsher rules and penalties, child molesters would all but drop off the face of the earth. but how to ge the kids to feel comfortable talking? how about a cash award if they tell the truth and they really were touched. now that whole "'i'll kill you" or "i'll die, and you don't want that do you?" line of reasoning won't work, cuz that kid's thinking "your ass is going down and now i can buy that x box 360 i've had my eyes on." but if they lie, they get something taken away. so they won't want to lie about being touched because then their toys would start disappearing. it's practically fool-proof.

but then again, such regulations would put the concept of american democracy at stake, and if you rpolitical system changed too much, the entire world economy would change. our system (political and economical) is so unique in comparison with the world, that changes would shift the way the world markets worked, affecting everything and everyone. not every country can be changed to match the "superior democracy" of the us, because then they would consume energy, oil, and other goods just as bad as the us does. that would not be cool, especially since global warming's already happening. it would just make it worse and make it happen faster. but, if the us started consuming like other countries, places were we get our products, like china, japan, madagascar, and other nations wouldn't have a market for the products anymore because the us is the largest consumer.

so i suppose it's best we don't follow suit with other countries, but now i'm concerned about the us making those other countries follow in our large, damaging footsteps......but it's late and i want to sleep.

though now i'm sure i'll dream of his holiness the dali lama wearing juicy and carrying a prada purse, with coach glasses and sunglasses while he sports his grillz....

the circle of life, for cameras

the other day i was heart broken when i found out that my pentax was screwing up really bad. one shot and for some reason my film was moving four frames before i could shoot again. before i knew it, six pictures took up an entire roll. i was hopeful that i could take it to my local camera shop and have the guy fix it.

the bill? at least $150 dollars for fixing a winder that was screwing up. what really irritated me was that the camera itself was only $70, including a camera bag, two lenses, a magnifier, two filters, and all the cleaning supplies a person could wish for with these things.

so while i was feeling like i got the shaft from "the man" for making dslr's all the freaking rage and therefore pushing out the trusty 35mm cameras from the market, my one consolation was the fact that my nikon was a-ok and my life using 35mm was still intact.

until i try to get a flash for it and the photo guy takes off the lens cap and says, i only see black? WTF!!! so i go home and change the battery, because mr. mirror happens to be battery operated, and it still doesn't work!!!

so now i'm really freaking, because not only is my pentax dead, but my nikon is on the fringes, and i have an advanced photography class starting in a few weeks. so i take my second trek to the photo shop to figure out what the hell is wrong with this camera. so when i get over there, it turns out that the spring is screwed up, and to fix it would cost, yet again, $150.

so i was told that it wouldn't be worth it to fix it an to just buy a new one. but what about the camera? is there anyone i can give it to? even for free, to just take so i don't throw it in my trash and and up compacting it next to trevor's diaper? nope. the camera is absolutely worthless, no one would buy it. finally we, and by we i mean the camera guy, figured out what happened and the mirror came back down and it was okay to take pictures once again. of course in this process i ended up exposing half of adams film with other frames, so now he has no film and i was still down one camera.

it was only half way home that i realized i didn't do the one thing i had gone to the shop to do, twice. i forgot to get a freaking flash for the nikon. so i went back and yay!! everything went smoothly and i was able to get a flash, $10 off, and with no tax!

so while the pentax is dead, the nikon lives on! no the hunt is on for another pentax me super or pentax that can use the same lenses, because i have all these other lenses and stuff that's still good, and i refuse to throw away.

as for the dead pentax, his body is being donated to science and i plan on taking it apart to dink around with it and have some much needed mechanical fun.

the secret life of helanpe morris

today i got a loan offer from some company on the east coast. too bad it wasn't exactly for me, but it was for helanpe morris, the mysterious girl who entered my life freshman year of high school. she kept getting offers for the national honor roll society, at first it was sorta cute, oh look, they really messed up my name...but as time went on, she kept getting these great offers and it started to annoy me that a fictional person could get better offers than me.

then i started wondering how she came about in this world. sometimes i fancy that she was created when someone was trying to say melanie, but they had a bad cold and it was over the phone where they went into a tunnel and had the service cut off. so my name couldn't be verified and the typist on the other end said "f it, i'm going home."

or maybe i sleep walk at night and i created helanpe morris. but then i realized that in order to get these honor roll society things, helanpe must be nerdy and preppy, not exactly the ideal alter ego for a person already geeky and with no social life when school starts up.

or maybe, just maybe, helanpe is my long lost twin that for some reason was never revealed to me, and at night my family steals her mail from my room to give to helanpe, who lives in the shadows of my room spying on me, waiting for the perfect moment to take over my life.

whatever the case, i think i'll start a helanpe morris file and keep track of her accomplishments through the offers she gets in the mail, because apparently some random company that's a part of slm corporations knows more about helanpe and her parents and how much they need a student loan and just because i'm geeky like that.

*insert creative title*

there are four things i ♥ right now.

1) submachine 2
2) yoga with rodney yee
3) homemade applesauce
4) yoga zone

the revolving door

so they killed the #1 most wanted man in iraq. some al-qaida guy and everyone was all happy that america had brought down a leader in the terrorist group. until the next day it was announced that al-qaida replaced abu musab al-zarqawi with someone else with i'm sure a similarly confusing name to pronounce.

my point is, won't it be rather difficult to fight a war on terror when this has escalated the number of people joining these kinds of groups? how are we, as a society, supposed to make the world a better, more peaceful place, when we use aggression?

the phrase "fight fire with fire" could be expanded on in what i feel to be an accurate analogy. i mean, fires do cancel each other out, only because one fire burns everything while another burns the rest until there's nothing left to burn and they go out. so fighting fire with fire only scorches everything until both fires are out. using this analogy, it's easier to understand that the only to effectively "win the war on terror" is if all potential terrorists are killed.

but can't anyone be a potential terrorist? so wouldn't everyone have to be killed in order for there to be on more terrorist strikes? think about the american terrorists. the unabomber and the oklahoma city bombings should all remind americans that terrorists are not one religion, not one race. they have the potential to be our math teachers, like ted kaczynski, or they can even be veterans, think tim mcveigh. even in this case, there were sketches of middle eastern men put out as the terrorists, when it was really good 'ol tim, a boy as white bread as they get. my point is, short of being jesus, any one has the potential for being a terrorist. so why fight fire with fire when that won't get anything done?

what's happened is that ameica has gotten so many groups mad at us, not just the french, to the point where the only country that really tolerates america is india. and that's just because that's where we outsource our jobs. the actions of the united states have seemed to have done more harm than bad and the people of these countries see it. what we as a country fail to see is that by acting the way we are, we're adding fuel to the anti-american fire that's starting to spread. the killing of known civilians in iraq by us marines was just one example of why the youth of these countries (the middle eastern region in general) have a reason to hate us and to join groups against america. what we've effectively done is create a revolving door. we kill one terrorist, another replaces him.

true, before america went into iraq a lot of people didn't like us. but do we really need to give them a reason to hate us? by acting the way we are, we've justified the sentiments of these groups, all the while adding to the number of people that sympathize with the country's plight.

it seems as if america's dug itself into a hole, and is trying to dig up in order to get out.

i love the shack

one of the greatest burger joints in hawaii was shut down because some idiot was taking money from the register. that place had great pupus and burgers. man, this is a downer....

questions of the week

is it bad that i taught my nephew "booze"?

what about how i just want to use guys and discard them like old shirts?

is it worse that i tell guys this? and they don't mind?

why can't i tell people what i really think of them?

how lame is it to have a crush on a guy that plays with dinosaurs?

why did they cut the tootsie pop commerical so you don't see it all?

speaking of which, how come mr. turtle couldn't get to teh tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?

why would he be too old?

if the devil took over the snake's body in the garden of eden forcefully, why did god punish the snake when the snake probably didn't want to be possessed?

what is coleridge was right about the dice game in the rime of the ancient mariner?

is kubla khan a cry for a better sex life?

and why does being on birth control increase the risks of gallstones?

summertime

it's only three weeks into summer, and i'm already bored out of my mind and eating skittles for lunch. i need some entertainment....possibly in the form of cooking up a french storm...

Dammit

In my head there are a million short stories and short films. They're all brilliant and would create a name for myself in the literary/filming worlds.


But I've got one issue. They only stay in my head. I can't seem to get them written down. Dammit.


I want to write, but I can't do the writing I want to because my English professor hates this semester's class and is making us write 4 essays for finals. I've got a week to do it, but anyone that knows me will understand that this still sucks. Because I'm gonna wait until the last minute to write something and I'm gonna be so hopped up on coffee that I won't be able to think straight.


I guess that's about it. I just needed to bitch. And to avoid doing my essays.

the story of skookum

I got a male convict chiclid because my female (Pook) was picking up rocks in her mouth and throwing them against my tank at night. Which would be fine, except that I sleep very light these days and the sound wakes me up all the time. Since her only other tank mate was a sucker fish (aptly named Sucky), I decided to journey to the city of Modesto to get a mate for my Pook.


That's when Skookum came in the picture. At first, Pook nipped at him and wouldn't let him eat the fish food, but after about a week she let up and my fish tank was in perfect harmony. It got even better when Pook laid her eggs. I was so excited to be finally getting a little fishie family, until Skookum ate the eggs. Then he started to nibble on Pook's scales, and then last night I see that Sucky is missing his right eye.


That little bastard Skookum ate out Sucky's eye!!! So I took him out of the tank and put him in another container that had warm water from the tank for him and plently of fishie food. And when I get home from class, I find out that Skookum rode the toilet express straight into the sewer plant that's clearly visible from the highway. So rest in peace you little bastard, and thanks for beating up Pook and eating Sucky's eye.

click click click

usually, when i'm at the college library, i'm one of the few that's actually typing. albiet i'm trying emails, mypace comments, and this blog, but i'm still typing and looking productive. today, i was bombarded with the sounds of frantic typing as my fellow columbianites struggle to finish essays for finals week. i'm not used to this sound, especially since i'm in the lab part of the library where people usually listen to music really loud. thank god for the guy behind me, or else i wouldn't know what to do. at least he's doing what everyone else usually does and listening to some screamo rapeo crapo music. i hope i'm not the only person at this college that can appriciate good music. but the evidence otherwise is lacking.....

that's...kinda weird....

Living in this county has always been a slight struggle for me. Not because there's nothing to do on a friday night but go bowling and end up seeing 15 people you in the process, but because of the guys.

I've never thought of myself as overwhelmingly hot, but I am aware that I can at times carry a certain air of...sexuality. My problem is that the guys in my county are no Don Juan (a great story by the way...). In fact I've been disgusted with myself when once I had a crush on a local boy and it turned out that he was my 5th cousin...eeewww. Even though a lot of states allow second cousins to marry, that's just gross. Even though he was a cousin from a married side of my family to a married side of his, and no real blood between us, I freaked. Being my first encounter with a possible relative as a crush in 4th grade, I instantly became weary of any guy that could be remotely cute if you sorta squinted your eyes in fear that he might be related to me. Because of this deep rooted fear, I've found that the only guys I attract and am attracted to are really kinda weird.

Three guys that I've liked were into Dungeons and Dragons, which can be a downer when you want to do something, but they can't miss their game day. Though this is nothing compared to these two guys I've recently found cute at Columbia JC. These two guys, yes they're nerdy and play X-box and have conversations like "Who's the hottest Disney princess?", but I drew the line when I found out they still played with dinosaurs. These guys are at least a year older than me, and being long past the third grade, I assumed that they had abandoned playtime, at least with plastic Dollar Tree toys. But I was wrong, and when joking with my friend, found out that they actually fought about what dinosaurs to include, so as to not get any Jurassic periods in with Triassic periods, that would ruin the purpose of the game.

So I abandoned all thoughts of these two guys and focused on another. He seemed fine. Smart, funny, and decent if you squint, but you don't really need to squint too much. There was only one thing that really dishearted me. According to a reliable source, this guy had tasted his own man juices. Skippy, just great I thought. Not that I'm against people exploring their own sexuality, but it just so happened that I stumbled upon possibly the one guy that had tasted his juices and told someone about it. And was then bold enough to say that man juice tasted better than woman juice. It was here that I found out that he wasn't a virgin (I always think the best of people until otherwise informed), and I wondered what his real motives were. I just thought it was strange how he was very much so against gay people (though I suspect he would have no problem with lesbians..), and yet he says that man juices are better than woman juices? I was confused, still am as a matter of fact.

It was after this that I realized that maybe I wasn't meant to ever have anything in the way of a serious relationship, and that the only guys I seem to attract are ones that would consider borderline-freaky. Though I did have one semi-normal relationship, the guy was heavily into D&D, even once ditching me for hours at a bbq to show his friends the old D&D manuel he got. But at least Jeremy set up dates with me, nothing like this Jerk L.C. that decided to blow me off without calling me and saying he couldn't make the date he set up for another girl at Sadies (so she was still in high school while he's had 2 years at a JC) and then thinks nothing of it when he calls to apologize.

Like I said, maybe I'm not supposed to have a decent relationship, maybe I'm doomed to spend the rest of my life attracted to guys that taste their man juice and having guys that play with dinosaurs attracted to me. Sometimes makes a girl want to join a nunnery...